The Fist Bump
I don’t know when fist bumping first started, but it is rapidly taking over and killing the high five. My first exposure to the bump was at a dive bar across from my old apartment. They had dart tournaments one night a week. I wasn’t a regular, but I did get to compete occasionally. We always had a dartboard when I was in college. I wasn’t great, but and I did score much better at darts than I ever did in my classes. Anyway, in the dart tournaments, you were randomly assigned a partner. I knew how to play darts, but I didn’t know the ins and outs of dart etiquette. Every time I would score well, my partner would give me the dreaded fist bump and say, “Good darts.” While I was unfamiliar with the tradition of fist bumping, I went along with it just to fit in with the uber-cool dart community.
I’ve since had time to reflect on fist bumping and I am now totally against it. There’s no worse feeling than going in for a high five and realizing that your partner is presenting a solid fist. Do you quickly close your hand and stumble into a weak wristed, half closed hand, fist bump? Or do you hold strong with your high five and awkwardly slap their closed fist? It’s really a no-win situation. I have decided that I will remain open handed and gently wrap my fingers around their closed fist. I will then hold onto their hand and just look into their eyes and smile, until they uncomfortably jerk their hand away. I believe this will effectively end the fist bump phenomenon, one uncomfortable hand holding exchange at a time.
I am with you The Great Monkey I can not stand the fist pump. It has unfortunately made its way into corporate American and it is killing me. I really miss the pat on the behind for a job well done.
Interesting email from the monkey’s Brother-in-law…
> When Moises Alou was playing leftfield in the Major Leagues 10 years ago, he started getting a lot of blisters on his hands because he refused to use batting gloves. So, his dad (Felipe Alou, also a former MLB player and manager) told him to soak his hands in his own urine and that would “toughen” his hands and they would not blister. Apparently he started doing it, it worked, his teammates found out, and they had to start the fist bump with him because they refused to shake his hand since they knew he bathed them in urine.
Network and ESPN TV Cameras televising Cubs games during one of their playoff runs back between 2003-2005 started picking up on the Cubs doing the fist bump, thought it was some cool new phenomenon and did features on it. It spread rapidly across the sports world and to the point it is at today.
Excellent post, Skinner. I agree 100%.
Last night we were flipping through the channels and ended up on “The Cake Boss”. 3/4 of the way through the show, the owner of the shop was meeting with a customer and went in with a fist bump. The customer came back open handed and closed his hand around the owner’s fist. This blog thing is really taking off!