After an intense logical and emotional study of the Dawgs 2009 schedule, I have determined that we will win the National Championship this year.  I’m pretty sure that we will also go undefeated.

     First off, our team will be much more grounded this year and will be extremely team oriented.

     Secondly, our schedule sets up perfectly for the ultimate run at the National Championship.

1-At Oklahoma State-This is huge!  OSU is actually looking past us!  We’ll win this one  convincingly, leading to a huge jump in the polls.

2-South Carolina-Lots of visor throwing and uncomfortable smirks.

3-At Arkansas-This will be a close one, but we will pull it out.

4-Arizona State-Humidity Baby!  They won’t know what to think at Sanford Stadium, big win.

5-LSU-They don’t beat us at home, period.

6-At UT-Welcome to the SEC, Lane.

7-At Vandy-We do what we’re supposed to do.

8-So called neutral site Jacksonville-UF-We just had a week off to prepare, Florida just got back from a scare at Starkville.  I don’t think Meyer will be calling celebratory time-outs at the end of this one.

9-Tennessee Tech-Time to get well.

10-Auburn-They’re not quite there yet.

11-Kentucky-Closer than it should be, but we prevail in the 4th.

12-Georgia Tech-Let’s tackle this time.  Go on and hold us to 42 points again.

13-SEC Championship-Alright Saban, here’s your payback.

14-BCS Championship-Bring it on Big (insert number here).

Any Questions?

 Talking Monkey means many different things to me, and it can mean whatever you want to you.  For future reference, when I say monkey, I’m really talking about an ape, specifically a chimpanzee.  At least that’s what I see when I imagine the Talking Monkey.  Sometimes it is really hard to find anything on TV, but if I see something with a monkey in it I am hooked! (Fake monkey movies excluded, eg. person in a monkey suit). 

   These movie monkeys are always trained to exhibit human characteristics, and I freakin love it!  I don’t know why, but I do.  And I’m not alone!  I have spoken with many other males that share in this love for watching these human acting monkeys.  So whether you love monkey movies,  or you love somebody who loves monkey movies,  maybe you can relate.                               
   Another meaning has to do with evolution.  Since I am pretty sure that we evolved from the same ancient parents that monkeys did, (I know it’s really apes, but I like saying monkey),  then that’s all we really are, talking monkeys!  By the way, this is not up for debate.  If you believe that you didn’t evolve, then you are absolutely right.                                                                   
   My daughter’s first animal impersonation was a monkey.  Now she talks all the time, like her father, hence another talking monkey!                                           
   In this case though, I am the Talking Monkey.  So please visualize a chimpanzee sitting at a computer, pounding out these random thoughts just for you.  Talking monkeys are terrible at grammar so please don’t hold that against me.  Every once in a while, I may get frustrated and throw some feces at you through the bars, but please forgive me…I’m still a monkey after all! 

   This blog is a journey to self awareness, and I’m sure there will be many pitfalls along the way.  I am using this website as a way to raise capital for my dream job.   Hopefully I will start making money from advertisements.  I’ll never charge people to join, but I would like you to register just to keep up with who’s here..

I am far from knowing everything, so comments will be a very important part of this website and gratefully appreciated.  I value your opinions, corrections, etc.. These will enhance the usefulness of this site.  Please feel free to contact me at any time.

  Someday I will create and run the Talking Monkey Brewery.  Hopefully someday you will be holding a cool, refreshing and delicious, Talking Monkey Ol’ 73 and  think, “I made this journey with the Monkey”.  I hope that something, or lots of things from my journey helped you in yours, and maybe, just maybe, I entertained you a little along the way. 

Come on, let me buy you a banana.

Sincerely,                                                                                                                                  The Talking Monkey